How Holding Hands Will Change Your Relationship

There is no simpler act of romance than holding hands. This is a gesture that affirms to your partner that they are loved, cherished, and wanted. I am a firm believer in holding hands in public; there is a commitment to each other to be a couple in the public eye. It says “I love this person, and I am proud to be associated together”.

It is the sweetest of romantic gestures, from those first early childhood friends, all the way through to our intimate partners, to me the holding of hands signals “lovers”.

Jimmy Fallon told a beautiful story after his mother passed away “When we were little, my mom would walk us to the store, me and my sister and we would hold hands, and she would squeeze my hand three times and say ‘I love you’ and I would squeeze back ‘I love you too’”. I love the intimacy of non verbal couple communication, and this little triple squeeze is a now part of my daily interactions with my man.

Holding hands speaks to your partner on many levels, and has many proven benefits for your health & happiness including; decreasing the stress hormone cortisol, increasing oxytocin– the hormone of bonding & connection, lowering blood pressure, reducing pain, an analgesic effect on stress & pain

Not only are there all of these health benefits, holding hands also increases physiological synchronisation which is the key to creating deep rapport. Couples who are holding hands will find their heart and respiratory rates become synchronised, and even their brain waves begin to match frequency.

It is an act of love that beautifully dovetails with Things You Already Do. Like going for a walk, driving in the car, sitting together on the lounge. Holding hands is a romantic symbol of unity, and creates a strong physical anchor for intimacy.

Let’s make it a pleasurable experience – like it’s poor cousin, the handshake, the pressure and position are super important. A limp hand is awkward and yuk. Practice having a firm grip without squeezing too hard. Ask your partner to give you feedback – harder, softer, firmer, squeeze more…. beautiful.

How do you feel about holding hands? In public? And your partner?